farawayplace | Mingle Post

[He hadn't meant to be vague really, but...]

I don't care about Ken. I'd rather you be wary more than anyone.

[Okay Gold might care if Ken got hurt but whatever, he was never a goody two shoes to begin with. When Gold insisted he elaborated, Kam found himself grimace at the mere thought of the person.]

His name's Vasily. I wasn't sure if you were him, or not. They're identical, both Vasily and Silver. The only difference was the fact Silver wore his hat different. ...and the fact both you and Silver... ...

[He didn't want to openly show how he felt in front of Gold. He wasn't the same goofy kid from New Bark he met years ago. He looked over to the side frowning.]

Vasily's his name. I realized you weren't him from the way you spoke to me. He never calls me by any name. He barely even acknowledges me and when he does... it's because I get in his way.

[Which Kam was more than happy to do given how much he loathed him.]

...he's dangerous. He has no qualms using his Pokemon to hurt others, or killing Pokemon off. Ironic given how he goes around acting like some so-called hero.

I don't care about Ken either, but he's friends with a big scary criminal guy who's gonna get pissed if Ken gets hurt by somebody that looks like me. And I'm friends with a little girl who's a big fan of Ken who I don't wanna disappoint.

[It's totally not that Gold himself gives a crap about Ken.

Gold listens, with a bit of a confused frown, but he's taking it all in. So "Silver" and "Vasily" are different people who both look like Gold. And this Vasily sounds like a big creep, even before getting to the part where he hurts people. Gold's face darkens and he gives a short, bitter laugh.]

A wannabe hero who hurts people and thinks he's better than others... My least favorite kind of person.

...You okay? ["Has he hurt you" feels like too personal of a question, so Gold keeps it vague.]

[To him it absolutely sounded like Gold cared, but he wasn't about to comment on that. Still, a big "scary criminal guy"--that reminded him of "Silver" and his questionable choice in friends, but given Vasily's existence maybe that shouldn't have been a surprise to Kam.]

We're on the same page, then. He should rot.

[Kam spoke, in response to Gold's opinion on Vasily. He won't go how deep his own hatred for Vasily was. Kam does however kept frowning, looking off into the distance. There was certainly a lot of flowers, and unfamiliar bug Pokemon. A good distraction- oh Gold was speaking to him.]

I'm fine. Just thinking...about Silver. I - ["like him." Silver wanted to say out loud but he couldn't get himself to spit it out. Funny just how easy it was to spew out all his anger, and hate but not this.] ...it's nothing. It doesn't change what happened, or the fact I'm here with no idea of knowing where he is.

[Gold nods in response to the comment about Vasily.

The way Kam stared out into the distance, though; that was worrying. Whenever his Silver spaced out wordlessly, that was a sign he'd heard or seen something bad he wanted to forget.

But if Kam's just thinking about "Silver" then that's probably not what's going on. Gold relaxes a little and smiles a little sadly.]

You miss him, huh? [Gold feels like he knows exactly how Kam's feeling from the way he looked when he spoke about him.] I miss my Silver, too. I was on my way to save him when I drifted here instead... I hate feeling so helpless. But I know now that when people are sent back home from here, they'll show up like no time passed at all. So, it'll be fine. I'll make it in time when I go back.

[Gold doesn't know what happened to Kam's Silver, but he hopes telling him this will help.]

[The way Gold was trying to empathize with him, reminded Kam of the way Kris would speak to him. They didn't know Silver, like he had. Yet they still had the kindness to try and encourage Kam. Still, he shook his head.]

Yeah I miss that idiot.

[There's a faint smile but it doesn't last. Especially at the mention of "time".]

......he's gone.

[Immediately there's weight inside of his chest for admitting it out loud. Grimacing, Silver shook his head. Gold didn't need to hear that. It was his problem, no one else's.]

Forget it. I just hope whatever you got, works out for you.

[Gold's eyes widen at the word "gone" and his head whips around to stare at Kam. Oh, damn. Did he just say something he shouldn't have?]

What?! No, but... You said you don't know where he is! So he's not dead, right?!

[There's a desperate tone to his voice as he says that. He wants to believe it. He's ended up seeing too much of himself in Kam, so it feels more personal than it should. Silver can't be dead!! He's just missing, right?]

[Oh he-he didn't mean to make Gold react that way. Immediate regret for what he let slip out. Kam shook his head.]

I don't know. He's just...gone.

[He's turning to look at Gold. He really wished the guy in front of him was Silver--but that wasn't fair to him, was it? Plus, Silver would laugh at all of this Kam was sure. Laugh that he's moping around.]

No one remembers him. Not his family, not even Elm. It's not just them but everyone in Johto talk as if...he never...

[Kam stopped, looking away again.]

...I thought maybe, in a place like this he'd show up like nothing ever happened.

[Not dead, then... That's good. Gold lets out a sigh of relief.]

Man, you scared me for a moment there... I thought he was dead. But if he's alive then there's a chance to bring him back. And yeah, he could probably show up here too.

But... I guess I get what you mean by "gone"... Just totally disappeared like he was never there? That's pretty scary. But you're the only one who remembers... Huh. Maybe you've got some kinda power to remember things other people can't, or whoever did that to him wanted you to remember...

[Gold looks thoughtful. He's mumbling his thoughts out loud, trying to figure it out. That kind of a power does ring a bell, and he hesitates for a moment before speaking up.]

...Hey, can you keep a secret? That kind of reminded me of something, but it's about a friend... Well, it's about Silver. My Silver. I dunno if he's even keeping it a secret, but I don't wanna blab about something like this anyway. But if it could help you, then... I think it's probably okay? So,um... Promise you won't tell anybody else.

If he is I won't forgive him.

[He says as if he has control over whether "Silver" is dead or alive. He won't even think to correct Gold--because he's not even completely certain whether "Silver" was alive or not. At the mention of remembering Silver, Kam remained quiet letting Gold try to put the pieces together. He even considered telling Gold what had happened, until he continued on about a secret. Intrigued, Kam looked at him.]

A secret, huh? It's not like we don't all have those.

[The amount he and Silver had was too many to count. Crossing his arms, Kam seemed to be thinking over what Gold told him, before he spoke up once more.]

How about this? I'll tell you a secret and you can share what you know. It's all about give and take. You should remember that.

[Gold might already know that but Kam still couldn't help the way he felt looking at his particular face.]

[Gold just glances at Kam at the first sentence, looks away, and nods.]

Yeah, I get it.

[At the suggestion, though, Gold's slightly surprised, and ducks his face a little to hide a blush, embarrassed that he didn't think of that. Maybe he should be more careful with the things he tells people... Ultern might've made him softer and more trusting. And Kam having Silver's face makes Gold feel like he can trust him, too... He feels like a hypocrite.]

Yeah, you're right... I should remember that. [He nods sagely, and looks at Kam, making eye contact.] Thanks, Kam.

[Now that he looks at Kam properly again, he realizes he's got much lighter grey eyes than Silver does. Or does he? It's been a long time since Gold's seen his Silver. Still, it's a reminder that Kam's not the same as Silver. And despite that, Gold feels like he can trust Kam to keep a secret. Not because he looks like Silver, but because of everything he knows about Kam.

And so, he waits for Kam to tell his secret first.]

Edited (forgot a word) 2023-08-05 22:42 (UTC)

[Kam found himself surprised again this time by Gold's reaction. It made him think about the difference that made him and Silver different. Kam had been on that end before, and he remembered the smile Silver wore when it had happened. Which in turn was different from the stupid smug smile Vasily wore. He remained quiet until Gold spoke up again, and looked in his direction.

A smile formed on Kam's lips.]

"You know...you're lucky that I like ya."

[He repeated what Silver had told him years ago. He had been naive then, despite the situation he had been in, at the time.]

Or otherwise I'd take what I can from you and throw you down when you least expect it.

[Not that he intended to do that to Gold. Kam continued on, deciding to get on with the secret sharing.]

Silver and I had been friends for three years. ...that part isn't the secret. It's the fact I met him when I was 11. The day I stole my first Pokemon from Elm's lab.

[He'll then gesture to himself.]

I know I became 14 along with Silver, only to then wake up as an 11 year old again. In fact, I thinking on it still, I think I know why I still have memories of Silver. I was right next to him when he told me, it was time for him to leave for good.

[Kam became silent after that, as his mind dwelled on how he had tried so hard to convince Silver to stay. To how the hand he held out to Silver was ignored by him.]

[Gold looks at Kam with slight surprise at the non-threat. It's not intimidating, more like nostalgic. It's the exact sort of thing he'd say with a smile on his face. Or he used to, but lately, taking what he can and then throwing people away hasn't had the same sort of appeal. Still, after a beat, he smiles. He can really see himself in Kam.

The story Kam tells, though... That's unexpected. Gold can't help but stare, his mouth falling open.]

He... He left? Why? I mean, you probably can't answer that... But he better have a good reason.

[He's angry on Kam's behalf, now. What the hell was the other him thinking, leaving him like that? And turning time back? It had to be him who did that, right? That's so weird... But to have that kind of a power...

He looks away, and takes a breath to calm himself, before continuing to talk. It's his turn to share a secret, after all.]

...So. This isn't the secret I was gonna tell, but maybe I should start with this one. My family's actually got a power that's passed down the bloodline or whatever... Powers from Arceus that make them super strong. I didn't get the powers, but my mom and my cousin got them.

[A slight bitter tone rises in his voice as he says that.]

They're supposed to help them fight some evil that'll rise in their lifetime or whatever... So maybe your Silver's got something like those too. The powers my family got are different though, they can't time travel or anything like that... Or maybe they can, I dunno. I guess I wouldn't know.

[He opened his mouth about t reply to Gold's question only to close it. He had an idea but whether it was true or not, there was no way for Kam to tell. Did Silver really care about anyone? About him?

...of course he had, why else would he have done or said the things he's did?

He's turning his focus to Gold as the other shared. A power that was passed down.... Arceus... for a second his mind was more focused on that until he catch the bitterness in Gold's voice. Kam's staring before, without thinking he reached out to place a hand on his shoulder.

He could recognize the frustration in Gold, having had it himself, and a part of him wondered if Silver had ever felt that. If he had, he had certainly didn't show it around Kam.]

I'm not sure about a lot of things with Silver, too. I realize the only thing he shared was his real name, and how much that shit forsaken town of his poisoned both his and Vasily's minds.

Before he disappeared I didn't even know about Vasily, but how could I when that town had him so sheltered and refused to let him step outside the first time around. They had no qualms throwing Silver out, not caring about him until he became 14!

[There's a sigh, as Kam closed his eyes trying to calm down. When he reopened them, he stared right into Gold's face.]

What about you, Gold?

[Gold startles at the hand on his shoulder, before seeing it's Kam and relaxing.

It's a bit strange to tell anybody about that part of his past. He doesn't think he's ever really talked about it with anyone outside his family, since there hasn't been any reason to do so. Maybe he's angrier about it than he thought he was.

He looks at Kam when he talks about that town, and shows no surprise to anything he says. It doesn't match his experience from back home, but he's not all that fond of his hometown either.]

So it was that town that did it? New Bark? [Gold asks for clarification, since he knows at least one other him grew up in a different town. But whatever town Kam's Silver grew up in must've been worse than his. No wonder that guy learned how to lie.]

Me? Well, I... grew up basically on my own. [He looks away, rubbing the back of his neck just to have something to do with his hands, and talks with a neutral voice, masking his feelings.] Mom was an asshole, so she usually ignored me, hit me, or left me alone at home. Nobody else in that town really cared either, so I stole food and stuff to survive. ...Well, there was one kid who cared. Gave me his old clothes and food sometimes. [Gold looks down at his shirt, pulling at the collar as he remembers being given it.] ...Then one time Elm gave me a Pokemon so I could go fetch something for him, so after that I just left and didn't come back. Oh, and I met Silver! Good times.

[He shrugs, and looks at Kam with an overly bright smile.]

How about you?

[Kam regretted putting his hand on Gold. He wasn't too much on being touchy feely either. Both Silver and Kris had been but the two had always respected his boundaries if he ever showed any discomfort. In fact he moved his hand back, nodding his head in response.]

Yeah, New Bark. Or as Silver would call it Old Fart Town.

[As much as he made a face when Silver dropped that horrible joke on him, he figured maybe Gold might get a kick judging by his reaction.

He doesn't say any more, to listen to what Gold had to go through. It didn't sit right with him not that Kam could change either of their pasts. That and the smile Gold wore reminded him of how Silver would smile at him. Bright, and seemingly full of hopes and dreams and whatever other sappy things people would say.

It made Kam tear his gaze away, not wanting to face that smile much longer.]

......I don't know how different your Silver's life might be from mine, but...I never knew my Mom. Maybe she left, maybe she died. Who knows, but my Dad... it didn't even matter if I was there or not. Since he was never around to begin with. Before I knew it, it was just myself at home trying to figure out how to take care of myself only for him to decide he'll just leave for good altogether. All because he lost to some guy who singlehandedly defeated him and the Rockets.

[There's a dry laugh from Kam.]

I don't even care enough to wipe up after the rest a second time around, believing that man would ever come back for anyone. ...but, anyway. I decided I just had to become strong by myself. Even stole my first Pokemon from Elm when I found out about his lab. It had been easy to slip in and out. I hadn't realized it was thanks to Silver turning a blind eye despite noticing me.

[Kam will stuff his hands into his pockets, while feeling the familiar surface of Silver's Pokedex in his left pocket.]

...he was sent out on an errand too by Elm when we first battled.

[Gold laughs at the joke, his smile genuine for a moment.

He listens to Kam thoughtfully. Hm... Maybe he shouldn't have asked, but it's too late to change his mind now. He doesn't actually know much about his Silver's past, but he hopes it's not too similar to this. It feels wrong to find out about him behind his back. But, well, this is about Kam, not Silver, so it's probably fine.

So Kam had to take care of himself at home, too... Gold knew he had a kindred spirit in him. He's tempted to ask how he learned how to do basic things like cooking or laundry, but now's not the right time for that.

Hearing the word Rockets, Gold's eyes widen in slight surprise. That wasn't a word he'd ever hear so casually from Silver's mouth.]

Huh... You know, your past's gotta be different from my Silver's. Whenever anybody even says that word around him, his eyes just... [Gold makes a vague gesture with his hands.] ...glaze over. Like he's not hearing or seeing anything. It's kinda... scary, y'know? That's why I haven't tried asking him about his past much. I hate making him look like that.

[Gold looks sad for a moment as he remembers that look Silver would get. Like there was something so painful he didn't even want to acknowledge it.]

...He stole one of Elm's Pokemon when I met him too. Or, I didn't see him stealing it, but somebody else spotted him anyway. Maybe I shoulda lied too and said I didn't see him when they asked, but I didn't think about that back then. Well, I didn't really care about him back then, since I only thought about myself. I gave them a fake name though! They're looking for a Pokemon thief named Pidgey. [Gold gives a thumbs-up and a wink.]

[There's a small shrug from Kam at Gold'a comment. There were parts of his past he still struggled to share, but if he were to say them he had hoped Silver would be the one to hear it. Yet Silver wasn't around. Still at the mention of how Silver reacted to the world about Team Rocket had Kam fall silent.]

There's some things you can't deal with no matter how much time passes. I guess having my mind caught between Silver just made me feel like... none of that stuff is related to me anymore. Feels like sometimes I'm looking on in through a window, still.

[To the point where Kris couldn't understand his lack of interest over anything Team Rocket started up. It had nothing to do with him.

He does however smiled a small smile at Gold's fake name.]

He didn't even give them a name. He told me how stupid did they think a Pokemon thief would be to give out his name after committing a crime. I really couldn't understand why anyone would want to cover for me like that. ...he scared me. Like he wanted to dangle the truth over me and kick me to the curb when the moment was right. He never did, and to this day Elm has no idea.

Huh... Yeah, I guess I kinda feel that way about some things too. But I dunno, feels different when it's my Silver doing that...

[Gold frowns thoughtfully, then decides he doesn't want to try and explain what makes it different. He doesn't want to dwell on it when he doesn't know what's really going on in Silver's head when he does that.]

I guess it is dumb to say your name when you're committing crimes! [~~Somewhere, in another world, a Silver sneezes.~~] I gotta remember that the next time I do a crime. [Said light-heartedly.]

...Yeah, that'd be pretty scary, huh. If it's somebody you know is a criminal lying to protect you, you can kinda guess why, but if it's a law-abiding type, you don't know why they'd do that. ...Anyway, your Silver sounds cool! Cooler than any of the other me's I've heard about.

[Other than the "disappearing from existence and erasing everyone but Kam's memories of him and also turning time back" part, which Gold is just kind of "???" on, so he can't really judge that yet.]

Different, huh? ...

[He won't force Gold to elaborate further. It wasn't his business and from what Gold had told him it wasn't a comfortable subject. Kam at the mention of name giving wore a bit of a crooked smile.]

Funny given how I did just that. I was arrogant thinking nobody would be able to touch me.

[He does however cross his arm, and again sighed.]

Cool? I wouldn't go that far. He's a reckless idiot. Never thinking to tell me important things until it was an afterthought in that pea brain of his.

[No way in heck was he going to gush about Silver in front of Gold.]

Arrogant, huh? Maybe my Silver was the same way. Or maybe he just really wanted me to know his name!

[Gold shrugs. He doesn't know, and he doesn't want to start guessing in front of Kam.

He lets out a laught at the description of Kam's Silver.]

Oh yeah, that sounds like something my Silver would say about me too! Man, I miss him. He's so fun to be around. I feel like we just understand each other better than anybody! Even though I know almost nothing about him and he knows nothing about me, we just match perfectly! Like, when I make a joke, he catches on and plays along in a heartbeat!

[Unlike Kam, Gold clearly has no qualms about gushing. He hasn't had a chance to really talk about Silver in a long time!]

Only he'd know his own reasons for telling you.

[Kam too, shrugged. He too wasn't about to give reasons for another Silver. Although knowing his own Silver, the other would have laughed it off and found it charming (why?).

When Gold continued on about how much he got along with Silver, Kam's expression softened. He couldn't help but think back to his time with Silver back home. He had always joked, and tried to lighten the mood around Kam. His stupid jokes, to that laugh.]

...yeah, I miss him too.

[It wasn't hard to admit that much to Gold.]

I wasn't much for jokes, but Silver was. He'd always try to lighten the mood saying I wore a scary look each time we met. Before I knew it, years passed between us and we kept being rivals and friends. I think it helped we were the same age.

Years, huh... [Suddenly wistful, Gold kneels down to look at the flowers.] I want that, too. I hope I can be with him for years and years. Rivals or friends or whatever. Just like you guys.

[Ah, damn, he feels like he's going to cry if he thinks about this too much. And then there's the thought of being separated from Silver like Kam was... He's got to bring the mood up. Gold quickly looks up at Kam with a tight smile.]

You know, I thought it'd be confusing talking about our Silvers when they both have the same name, but I'm already used to it! Weird how that works out!

[When Kam opened his mouth, he wanted to say something encouraging to Gold. His words however became stuck the moment he thought of Silver, and the smile he wore as he left. Nothing was guaranteed to them, he should have known better. Closing his lips Kam tried to think of anything else to say, but it seemed Gold beat him to the punch.]

It's not something that happens everyday that's for sure.

...and it's not like we'll go around calling each other Gold around here. Unless...

[He's glancing over to Gold for a second. Sure, he might not be the same Gold that ~~bruteforced~~ gave him friendship buuut, Kam is smirking. There's an obvious, scheming look in his eyes.]

You know I have picked up an awful habit from Silver back where I came from.

Oh?

[Gold catches on to the mood and gives a similar scheming smirk in return. Whatever this is, it seems right up his alley!]

Iiiiinteresting... Tell me more!

[It was good that Gold caught onto his intentions. That made things easier, and a good change of subject still.]

I'm sure you've caught on that neither of us go around using our real names. It made things easier in the long run. So, how about this? Why don't we share a name? I can leave the name to you.

[~~Just don't say something like Schtolteheim Reinbach III-~~ whether Gold decided to partake in this shenanigans, Kam wasn't going to judge him.]

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